Tonight I cried
I just want to thank you for sharing Tuesday's with Morrie with us; it was truly inspirational, moving, and beautiful. I have never considered myself a very emotional person, sometimes even my own family would make jokes regarding my apathy, and at some point I think I might have even prided myself on it a bit, foolishly enough.
When I think about it I don't think I've cried over anything in the past several years, not because my life was unaffected my sadness but I felt I closed myself off from anything that could hurt me, but at the same time now I believe I was also closing my heart off to things that were truly important in my life. Attempting to remain indifferent afraid to be hurt, but also afraid to be loved just the same. Tonight I cried. At the moment I want so desperately to call my parents, to tell I love them and simply hear their voices, for I don't do that nearly often enough.
As the movie began, honestly, I was only half paying attention, debating on whether or not these two hours would go to better use studying or reading. Watching that movie was the best few hours I have spent in a very long time. Morrie's story really struck me, especially when I heard that the disease slowly claiming his life was ALS. My tenth grade math teacher had the very same disease. I was in shock really, I hadn't spoken of my algebra two teacher for nearly two years and suddenly a week before I ended up telling his story to my roommate one night and then Morrie's story comes up. The times in which Morrie's own 'bad times' came up, hit me extremely hard.
I remember my own teacher all too clearly; he stayed with us, teaching with everything he had, until his body could no longer take the stress. I watched the progression of this disease first hand, at the beginning of the year my teacher was perfectly health, by Christmas time he could no longer stand on his own, by March he was on oxygen, the next month he retired from teaching. Yet every day before he left he always wore a smile, he would joke, and laugh, and say optimistic things constantly, and at the time I wondered how, why wasn't he sad, or anger, or negative.
Now I see why, he had accepted love into his heart; the love of his family, of the school staff, of us, his students, and he was truly happy. Like Morrie a truly inspiring, wonderful person. I wish like Mitch I was able to go visit my teacher, to hear his stories and learn whatever it was he could teach me, for undoubtedly it would be life altering. I found out tonight my teacher passed away one week ago today, on March 4, 2011. I can only believe that some stronger force lead me to watch this movie tonight and I feel extremely lucky that I was able to meet my very own version of Morrie, although his wisdom was lost on me then, now I see, I understand and I love him, and I love my family, and friend, and people I meet on the street or on the bus. And I hope one day everyone can feel this way too, I'm so happy today, so terrible sad, but so truly happy. Thank you again.